Recently I was told that a “love” relationship should not be that hard. As I pondered this I began to reflect on my own relationships, with either; parents, siblings, children, friends or significant others. Then my attention turned to the Cross at Calvary and I asked, “Lord, why is this so hard?” His answer, “Everyday I go through rejection, as another child of mine rejects me, but I still relentlessly pursue them, I do not give up, this is how I want you to love.” Relentless pursuit…. The Word of God says, “We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19
As I look to the Cross at Calvary, the love of Father God is evident; “For this is how God loved the world: He gave His one and only Son so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent His Son into the world not to judge the world but to save the world through Him.” John 3:16 NLT
Father God sacrificed His son, for us, out of love, but Father God was not the only one who sacrificed; Jesus did too. Jesus willingly gave His life as a sacrifice because of His love for us. “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8. The Word of God further says; “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love…” John 15:9 ESV
Both Father and Son thought of us first in this great sacrifice, so that we could have an intimate relationship with them, and the barriers of sin would finally be broken. This unselfish love thought of us first. This is love…that we lay ourselves down for one another. We live in a world where love is conditioned on what we will first obtain from the other person, but this is not real love. Perfect love, unconditioned and selfless, thinks of the other first. It sacrifices and does not think of itself, it doesn’t throw the relationship away because the other person is not perfect, it does not give up, and it certainly does not destroy. It is selfless, unconditional, it does not take offense, and it long suffers. Am I saying we must stay in an abusive relationship? No. What I am saying is that we don’t throw away people or relationships because they are not perfect or because they are broken and hurt people. We must love but also learn to set healthy boundaries, love is not conditioned on the other person. Love is freely given regardless of their brokenness, regardless of their imperfections and regardless of their inability to love back. As we love them, they will see the love of God and won’t be able to help being captivated by an everlasting love, wherein inevitably it’s that unconditional love that changes people, heals people and turns circumstances and events around.
Ultimately we must all ask ourselves this one question….. How well do I love?